Getting pregnant > Fertility problems > Fertility issues > Coping with not conceiving

Coping with not conceiving

We share the secrets of staying sane when its taking longer than you ever expected to get pregnant
If you're at a point in your life when the one thing that's missing is a baby it can be incredibly frustrating to keep trying month after month with no success. In a sense we all take the ability to have a child for granted, especially after years of trying not to get pregnant, and it can often come as quite a shock if you don't manage to conceive right away.

If it is taking a little longer than expected it may come as a reassurance to know that only 30% of couples conceive within their first 3 months of trying however, over 85% conceive within 12 months and over 95% within 24 months, so in all likelihood by this time next year you will have a little bambino of your own to cherish. Having said this statistics take on very little meaning when you're coping with the endless highs and lows of not conceiving each month. So what can you do to make the bumpy ride to baby easier?

Relax -

The first thing everyone always says is 'relax and it'll happen'; the phrase 'easier said than done' springs to mind in reply. While it is almost impossible to relax when you're counting days and looking for signs that this could be the month you get a positive there is a lot to be said for a bit of 'r and r'. In fact some research has found that lowering your levels of stress can help with your chances of conceiving so taking some time out to pamper yourself is no bad thing. At the very least going shopping, watching a comedy or even going to an exercise class at the gym will help to take your mind off things for a couple of hours.

Don't feel guilty -

It can be very easy to blame yourself or your partner for not having yet conceived but remember it's no one's fault. The most healthy couple only have a 20 - 25% chance of conceiving each cycle so realistically its just nature doing its thing. On the same note try not to feel to angry or frustrated with your partner if they aren't reacting to the situation in the same way as you. We all deal with things differently and while some of us like to vent, others like to hide their upset. Just because they aren't showing it, it doesn't mean that they're not feeling the disappointment.

Share the load -

Trying for a baby can be a very isolating experience especially if your friends have children or are falling pregnant around you. The most positive thing you can do for your own well being is to share your feelings with others; talk to your partner, parents, friends or anyone that you feel comfortable with. Even if you don't feel you can offload to anyone you personally know it can be good to chat to others in a similar situation as this provides a whole nother level of support. Chat rooms or forums are a great place to vent and because of the anonymity they give you freedom to say what you really feel. Click Here to visit our talk forums and find support with others who are trying to conceive.

Take a break -

While charting your fertility and pinpointing when you ovulate does help you to maximise your chances of doing the baby dance at the right time it does put both you and your partner under a lot of stress to perform. This is being recognised to such an extend that some experts are now recommending that rather that rigorously monitoring your fertility you should simply focus on having regular sex throughout your cycle. Even if you're not willing to give it up completely, taking a break can be good for putting the zing back in your sex life and helping you to relax - both of which are only going to help your chances of conceiving.

Don't set goal posts -

Once you start trying to conceive its very easy to set yourself goalposts but unfortunately mother nature doesn't always have the same plans. Rather than thinking 'I'll be pregnant by Christmas' or 'I'm going to have a baby by my next birthday' it's much better to just to relax and try and enjoy the ride no matter how bumpy it feels.

Keep busy -

It sounds cliched but one of the most effective ways to cope with not conceiving is to keep busy. Its so easy to put life on hold and not do things because you're hoping to have a baby soon; this only puts added pressure on you and your partner and means that you miss out on life's wonderful opportunities. So, book that holiday, take a new class or learn to play the guitar, you never know sod's law may just come into its own!

Enjoy couple time -

You may not believe it now but once you do fall pregnant and baby arrives you'll look back on your days as a childless couple with a fondness that only someone who has been severely sleep deprived will understand. Enjoy the lie ins and romantic dinners or even just the opportunity to snuggle up and read a good book uninterrupted. Spending quality time as a couple will help to make the baby making process a whole lot more enjoyable for both of you.

Hold your head high -

Family events or even catching up with old friends can be stressful when you're trying to fall pregnant, being told that 'its about time you had children' or mentions of that 'ticking clock' are never particularly welcome when you're longing for a baby. In these situations remember that just because you aren't yet pregnant it doesn't make you a bad person; holding your head high and delivering a witty quip such as 'at the moment we're just having fun practicing' will help to silence these upsetting (no matter how well intended) enquiries.

Keep informed -

Things become a lot less scary when you understand them so reading up on getting pregnant and knowing what to expect can remove a lot of the stress and uncertainty from your journey but as always, if you need extra reassurance or advice visit your GP.

If its taking longer than you expected to get pregnancy visit our Talk Forums and share your highs and lows with others in a similar situation.

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I have been with my partner for 11 yrs we decided to start ttc in the summer i came off the pill in august and have had my pill cycle then 3mths later a normal cycle. My body feel like its going to produce a cycle every month but i get nothing. I have been to the docs and they have done blood tests for loads of things but it all came back normal now i really dont know what to do next.....i cant try if i dont know when my cycle will come!!
can anyone help? i was on the pill for 10yrs and know this could have an effect on my cycle but i thought i would have had more by now, docs think it is just pill in my system due to blood test results and now im wondering how do i get my cycle back? Please please help
by 296 8th Mar 2011, 5:52pm
hi everyone am 28,, already have 2 boys, me an my partner are tryin over a year now nottin happen, its my biggest wish for both of us to have a next baby,,
by simone8228 17th Jan 2011, 3:14pm
I am 21 a already have a wee boy i fell pregnant wen i was 18 and gave birth when i was 19 my partner and i had been together 2 years and want to start a family though many would have said we were too young and even now i wudnt have waited but wen we started tryin we fell pregnant straigt away i came off the pill had my period next month my next period never came we are now tryin for another baby and it is takin its toll on me we have been tryin for 6 months and i dont think were doin anythin different from the last time i mite be a little heavier than i was at 18 but my weight cant make that big a difference im not obese can anyone help
by sammy61108 3rd Dec 2010, 5:36pm
I have been married for 2 years and I had a misscarriage a year ago. I waited a year and then tried again only to have another misscarriage. I just feel like scared that if I try again the same thing will happen. Mean while my best friend is pregnant I just found out and her due date is the same date I was given for my baby I recently misscarried. I am happy for her but feel traumatised by the fact I now have to watch her go through a pregnancy which would have been my pregnancy had I not lost the baby. All the milestones will be the same.
by wildrose 22nd Nov 2010, 3:33pm
My husband and i have been trying to conceive for about a year now. I have tried ovulation kits to see when i was ovulating and nothing, i went to the gynae and he has put me on Clomid and still not luck. I have very irregular periods every month. I also have candida and i believe that candida kills the sperm! I am also Gluten intolerance. Can this be a problem. I dont know what to do anymore. I have even changed my diet drastically! I am ready to give up!! Any one please can you give me advise.
by cavell 9th Nov 2010, 5:09pm
We have been married for 8 years, and were blessed with a baby girl, who is now 6. We have been trying to conceive again, but we failed. Doctors said I have reached a stage where I cannot produce an egg monthly. Dey tried fertility tablets, which when used I do see my period but when I stopped taking those tablets, menstruation stopped also. We are ready and anxiously so, my daughter is also ready, she always say she does not have a little baby sister or baby brada. Please help us.
by SIBO 3rd Nov 2010, 2:12pm
We're married for 3 yrs. I want to get pregnant soon. I'm 31,my husband is 38. He 's sperm cell's mobility moves slowly.what should i do
by yolarida 25th Oct 2010, 10:39am
Hello everyone...reading the comments here basically mirrored much of what i'm going through...we've been married for 1yr and 3 mos and still with not much success..I am just thankful that my hubby is very supportive amidst all of these..but of course i feel that my husband deserves to have that kind of joy and privelege of being a dad. also i'm turning 36 soon..and it scares me all the more that my chances are getting slimmer as the day passes by...
by carmencita 4th Oct 2010, 11:11am
Hi there I am 27 and mum of 4 and me and my husband have been trying to conceive baby no 5 for 14 months now! It is extremley dissapointing as i can not seem to see a time where i will get the pregnancy test and it will read positive :( We were trying for 2 1/2 years just to conceive our 4th child and i am hating the idea that this one may take just as long :( We have no medical issues either. I am hoping in the next 2-3 months we will get some great news but at the mo that seems unlikely.
by lesh07 12th Aug 2010, 10:36am
Hi. We've been trying for a while now and the start of my period yesterday meant it's been 18 months now. So far I've been really upbeat with a "nevermind - it'll happen soon" kind of attitude, but I'm feeling really down this time. Perhaps it's because 18 months realy feels like a long time. (I know it's not long compared with some of you) Also my period has been really weird this time and I'm thinking that it might have been more of an early miscarriage. I've been really achy during the last two weeks and feeling sick on and off. Of course it probably wasn't a pregnancy - it's just that if it was a miscarriage, it's at least a sign that something is happening. I've tried temperature testing, cm monitoring and day counting but found that it made me concentrate too much on it all and get stressed which is obviously the wrong thing to do. It's a big help just to be able to tell you all this even though I know you're all going through the same sort of thing. It's nice not to have to see the uncomfortable looks that people give you. Also I'm a teacher and my teenage students are always quizzing me about my lack of kids, unmarried status and career choice - are they in league with my mother? - is the world trying to make me feel inadequate?
by mfllady 11th Aug 2010, 5:19pm
I have been trying for only 5 months but my god is it heartbreaking every month! I have had two occasions where I have thought I may actually be pregnant, but the worst by far was this last time! I have always been like clockwork with my periods. When I was on the pill I would take my last pill on the Saturday and start without fail by the Wednesday morning. I came off of the pill in January and mjy periods have remained like clockwork! Last month I didnt come on until the Firday evening/Saturday morning! I was convinced after having always been so regular that this was the time and was so gutted when I got up on the Saturday morning to find I had started! This time around, I didn't come on until the Monday which means I was 5 days late from when I would normally start! I was devastated! I was totally convinced. I had it all worked out how I was going to tell my parents and my best friend and my other half had told me to go and get a test to find out for sure. I nipped upstairs for a quick wee before I went out to get one, and there it was! Devastated!
I haven't any children yet and this is breaking my heart not being able to concieve. My boyfriend is older than me at 43 (I'm 30) and I'm hoping and praying that our ages are not going to effect us having a child of our own!
by Josoaps 11th Jun 2010, 5:32pm
Hi. Well, 10 months of trying so far and it hasn't been easy. The emotional roller-coaster is so exhausting. I feel like all we do is wait. Waiting to ovulate, waiting for period to come, waiting for when to start trying again. One of the toughest things though is trying to tell myself that it isn't a personal failure, which unfortunately is how l view it sometimes. I did a silly thing at the 4 month mark - l went to see a clarevoyant (l know, not for everyone and to be taken with a grain of salt). Whilst she said l will one day get pregnant, that one day was another 12 months away. This of course made me feel worse than when l went there in the first place! Since then l decided to tell my family and a few friends that we have been trying for a while nowand it has taken little bit of pressure off. It does irritate me now though when they think they are not being obvious in constanly looking at my stomach for signs of pregnancy. I feel like l have to constanly suck my stomach in or make a point of ordering wine with dinner becuase otherwise the thought of them assuming l'm pregnant is too heart-breaking. It really shouldn't be this complicated!!! Fingers crossed it's next month.....
by megabeee 21st May 2010, 3:57pm
Hi i am 28 and am married with 2 kids. Me and my husband are childhood sweethearts and have been together for 13 years now. I am very proud of this as we have been through some hellish times and by sticking together have always managed to get through to the other side. I have a boy and a girl aged 5 and 7. Both conceived easily without any obsessing over cervical mucous and various other things. Myself and my husband would like a 3rd baby and have been trying for 3 months now. I was on depo injection for 5 years which i stopped last april. My periods returned immediatly although they were all over place they are now regular every 28 days. I am worried that something is wrong because with my son who is 5 now i got pregnant literally 2 weeks after we decided to try. I know i am worrying to much and i will probably get pregnant soon. Also having sex twice a month aint guna cut it is it ???? haha. Anyway just finished my period today and i am due to ovulate starting 26th march so i will bd for 5 days and see what happens. Has anyone else been in my position after taking depo injection ?????
by breastbuddy 14th May 2010, 5:21pm
hi there me and my partner have been trying for a baby for a year nothing is happening - and i am really struggling to cope ! all our frieinds have babies and i want to make out little family whole !
every one elce seems to find it so easy and even if they dont want one !
please help !!!!!!
by misswright 14th May 2010, 4:55pm
My husband and I have been together for 7 years and haven't used protection in 6. I have had tests and they say everything looks normal... We have been using a calculator to predict fertility for the last 3 months with no luck. I really hate it when people say "it will happen." or "It's just not your time". I am going to be 30 this year so the clock is definitely not on my side, but I will remain positive. Well as positive as a person can be in our situation(s) right?! Good luck to all and if someone that has posted would give updates that would be great! Thanks for listening.
by katekool 14th May 2010, 4:16pm
Hi I'm 37 and my fiance is 34 we have a 4 year old boy and have been trying for baby no2 for 4 months now. The problem is my partner works shifts and our little boy sleeps with us. We do try to make time, especially when ovulation is due but it is not always practicable. I try not to analsye every tiny sign each month but it is hard I just hope that this will be our year x. Good luck to all.
by missym 1st Feb 2010, 9:18am
got married jst 4months ago.everybody has started reminding me its about time i start having kids.believe me my hubby and i started tryin from our honeymoon still no sign of pregnancy.i cant talk to any hubby is as worried as i am.we are so fustrated.
by cheska 11th Jan 2010, 3:14pm
I'm 21 years old and my fiance is 23. We've been trying to concieve for 8 months. It's been a hard month and I feel like giving up. I found out another colleague is pregnant - this one from a one night stand!- and it just makes me want to cry that they all seem to be able to have what I want so much. I was utterly convinced this was it this month, I felt so...different. I was having sickness, lower back pain, I had a metallic taste in my mouth, constipation, my boobs were sore and swollen. I did the test, and another and another. All negative. I've never felt like such a failure, so utterly and completely devestated in my life. And my fiance saying 'Don't worry it'll happen' made me want to sob my heart out and beat him senseless all at the same time. Why is it so hard?
by panda1988 7th Jan 2010, 10:03am
Hi,We have been trying for over 2 yrs now.I have had 4 misscarraiges but have a healthy 4 year old son with a previous partner...It drives me mad when people keep saying to me 'oh dont worry about it u have 1 child,im sure you'll have another' How do they know??im a little worried that maybe its a combination of me and my partner...that we 2gether cant have a baby!! its so hard being dissapointed avery month....all i keep thinking is when is it our turn?? my cousin has had a baby,and im finding it hard 2 be happy 4 her when im hurting so much( sounds so selifish doesnt it? i've tried!!) It helps 2 know that im not the only 1 going through b/f tries 2 help & im sure hes finding this hard 2 but he never knows the right thing 2 say,when im feeling down.I love him so much and feel like im letting him down,theres so much preassure put on women!
by milliemum 30th Nov 2009, 11:15am
Hi, myself and my husband have been trying to concieve for 9 months, I am 33 he is 36. We dont have time to wait around as the clock is ticking. I have endometriosis (mild and was treated by a laproscopy 5 years ago) I am worried it will come back. I also had a cone biopsy 7 years ago. Is it reasonable to suggest that our doctor refers us to a specilist? I have had a transvaginal scan, which showed everything fine, blood tests, no infections, but I have been having pain for the last 9 months, Im worried this may be the endometriosis coming back or something else. On the positive side, I am using ovulation predictor tests and am ovulating, and making sure we have sex 4 days before, 2 days before, on the day, 2 days after and 4 days after. Anythin else we could try?
by kathy300 23rd Nov 2009, 10:59am
Hello, i found this site today, me and my partner have a little boy who has just turned 3, we have been trying to conceive again for 2 years now, ive run out of things to try. i went to the doctors after 18months and because we already have our son and because im only 24, he just laughed at me and said go away, ive lost count how many freinds and family members who are pregant and have given birth, im really struggling at the moment. When people say to me it will happen when its ready i feel like screaming at them, and dont know what to do
by sqwiggles 17th Nov 2009, 3:47pm
hey, me n my fiance have been trying for over a year now and no luck :( im too scared to go to the docters tho because i kno il only get more dissapointment... i really long for a child and i dont think i can keep strong for much longer, any suggestions what i should do?
by elle4dan 29th Sep 2009, 3:56pm
please feel free to contact me for any help or support you may need im laid back and always willing to offer my help~ wishes to you all
by yummymummy28 21st Sep 2009, 9:20am
hey all im new to this but me and my partner have been trying for about a year. ive finally built up the courage to go to the doctors and tell them its just not happening for me and theyve reffered me on to the fertility clinic at the hospital.still awaiting and appt tho. i hate always waiting for something like ovoulating and then my period then repeat. im sure it does it on purpose its now been 44days. with negative tests. :( o wel fingers crossed i get an appt soon .. gl to u all
by sharna2010 19th Aug 2009, 9:06am
well it is a bit comforting knowing i am not alone, but it still doesnt heal the pain i am feeling when trying to conceive and not being succesful. especially when i see everyone else around me who dont want kids having kids and having abortions.
i really feel like giving up because it really feels hopeless. i spend all day taking care of and playing with other people kids and cant conceive one for my self. i came close in 2007 and lost it due to a blighted ovum in 2007 after years of trying and praying at 3months. so i am really pissed and mad because it has been years since i have been tryingand i dont have a child to show for it.
by verysad 10th Aug 2009, 9:32am
Can Pregnancy Tests Be Wrong????
by lilc09 10th Aug 2009, 9:31am
i have had 3 miscarriages in 4 months why i'm 41 found out i was pregnant the other day and wow then the next day began to bleed a few little clots and that s it now pink bleed another miscarriage devastated xx
by sandra200 28th Jul 2009, 1:21pm
Hi, everyone!!!!! I know what your'll are feeling,I waited 3 months after leaving the pill until I fell pregnant but at 8weeks I miscarried. It's been two months now since my miscarriage but now more than ever I just can't wait to fall pregnant.I have used ovulation kits to try and get it right but the results are always negative, ovulation kits are a joke. But not falling pregnant already is making me depressed. I sometimes think maybe I am trying to hard......but I have such a longing for a baby. And all of my friends are pregnant and just had babies!
by seshnee 1st Jul 2009, 9:05am
Hi everyone. Gl with trying to get pregnant. I've been trying for two years now im 19 so still young doctors refusing to do tests as i'm so young. I've fallen pregnant in early march but sadly miscarried. I have regular periods. No problem never miss one. I tried everything in the book. Ovulation kits are a joke! Home insemination kits work (this is what i fell pregnant with). Also try having sex early in the morning. Ive been on the pill when i was much younger which lasted a few months so nothing like this is preventing me. Its got so bad between me and my partner as we are both very maternal people and cant wait to have a child of our own. Remember to have time as a couple. :) x
by lucie09 24th Jun 2009, 9:59am
hey all, oi find this website very helpfull to know that im not the only one. i got married in march and came of the pill in feb we wanted a honeymoon baby well 4 months on and still nothing it gets depressing. my sister is 2 years younger than me and in a crap realtionship and she falls pregnant straight away she is now 10 weeks and thats not all my dad has a young gf and she 12 weeks pregnant its really hard to listen to them comparing notes. im sick of eveyone asking me if im pregnant yet, that gets me down, so i have told ppl that i have gone back on the pill to stop the questions.
by cazzawig 9th Jun 2009, 11:16am
by ShareenElliisBabyx 8th Jun 2009, 9:57am
my partner and i have been trying for two years and it really gets me down when i get my period. i'm just glad i'm not the only one. i love my son but it would be nice if i could give my partner a baby of his own
by luvofpete 28th May 2009, 9:22am
I am so glad I am not the only one in this situation. Have been married for three years but trying for two with no success. Have been seen by a consultant have had all the tests and me and my husband are both fine I feel though we are never going to get there. I cry every month I have my period, have tried everything on the internet to try and fall pregnant, am eating healthly, having regular sex I just don't understand it. Am glad that Im not the only one in this situation and it will be good to speak to someone in the same situation so if you want to contact me please do.
by Kelly29 22nd May 2009, 9:24am
its crazy i thought i was the only one having trouble, me and my husband have been trying for over 3 years and still nothing. it makes me kind of sad cus for some reason i always think ' oh next month it'll happen' but it never does.
by waitn2 15th May 2009, 9:26am
Hi All

Ive joined this week and have been coming on this site everyday. I find these article very helpful, ive been trying for 2 months now sometimes it just feels depressing everytime !!!! :)
by Freesha 14th May 2009, 9:47am
Hello Everyone,
This is my first time visiting this sight. I Find it helpful to listen to some of your stories and concerns. My husband and I have been trying to have another child for quite a while. We had our first child early in our marriage (20) and decided to wait to have another one once we were better established in life. Well, now we are having the hardest time getting pregnant. I have had many concerns about my age (39) having a second child. My worries come from all over the areas of anyone getting pregnant after 35. I sometimes wonder if it is at all possible.
by Kaselyn 7th May 2009, 9:23am
Hi all,
ive been trying for 7 Months now and they are to me the longest months ever, lol i am blessed though with two Boys aged 11 and 8 years old and i have been broody for a year,lol....
three people i know are pregnant and are Due this year !!!! it hurts me ever month when i get my period because then im sad and think somethink is wrong with me !!!????...i got pregnant with my boys quick when i was younger, now im 29 my Dr has sent me for blood tests but were all Normal !!!! they say relax and it will Happen when you least expect it ,but i cant relax its on my mind contsantly???? my Dr now has referred me for a Abdomen Scan which im waiting for a Date still ??? i sympthize with people trying and know how they feel im going to keep on trying though !!!!!!! it will happen for us one day Lol all xoxoxox
by dec79 7th May 2009, 9:22am
Hi all,
I've not been trying for as long as some of you but it still really hurts every month when i get my period. I stopped taking my pill in Dec after being on it for 8 yrs. It really bothers me that some people can fall pregnant at the drop of a hat. Someone i know is 15 yrs old & pregnant with her 2nd, i'm 26 yrs old & can't even get pregnant with my first. It's all very well saying relax but it's all i can think about. I really admire the strength of you all who have been trying for a while, hopefully we'll all be successfull. xx
by stacymac 1st May 2009, 9:13am
Hi Everyone,
I'm new to this but I needed to express my thoughts I have been married for 5 years and have been trying for a baby for three with no luck. I have had my hormones checked and I am petrified of further checks. I work with a colleague who has managed to get pregnant without trying and who is crying on a daily basis how she hates this child and she does not want it because she does not want to get fat!!!! I am trying to be positive and supportive however my patience is wearing thin as she is 32 weeks and has only put on 6lbs!!!! aaaaaaaaaaHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! because she will not eat! ;-} Hi Emma my cycle also fluctuates between 30-34 days as far as Im aware this is normal stress, diet and lack of sleep tends to alter my cycle. We do use an ovulation kit which does highlight key fertile days in my cycle which is around day 18. I hope this was helpful
by raj111 28th Apr 2009, 10:24am
I am new to askbaby and joined only today. Reading the "coping with not conceiving has reassured me a little as I didn't realise the statistics were so high on when couples are likely to conceive. My concern is my cycle as I go from 29 days-34!! Is this normal? Emma
by emmacave 22nd Apr 2009, 9:17am
I find it frustrating that people say 'relax', but how can you when each month that goes by you still get that negative result. Its a vicious circle. I've been trying for nearly 7 months now, and yet people are falling pregnant all around me. I think I took it for granted that it would happen quickly. How more wrong could i be.
by lulu123 6th Apr 2009, 9:27am
My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for almost a year and a half. Every month I feel as though theres something wrong with me, some reason why I can't have a baby. My sister who was only married for two months became almost immediatly pregnate.We both want to be parents so badly and I'm at a loss for what to do.
by Renea21 2nd Apr 2009, 9:10am
Can you be feeling sick only three days after conceiving? Or I am seeing things because I want to get pregnant sooo much?
by mata777 16th Mar 2009, 9:24am
I cant believe its so hard to get pregnant. Me and my husband have been married 10 months and have been trying for a baby since the honeymoon. For years we would be careful and take precautions so we wouldnt get pregnant till we were ready, now we are and its just not happening. I think Im driving hubbie insane each month when I get my period and cry for hours. He wants a baby just as much. I was on the depo injection for 2 years. Was surprised to see so many others in same situation.
by blue1980 25th Feb 2009, 9:31am
i am so gald i am not the only 1 who is in this situation i have been married a year and trying 4 a baby every time i start my perid my husband says its not our luck y cant we have a baby that is our dream
my husband is not understanding and i am getting so stressed
by heartless01 17th Feb 2009, 9:51am
Hi me and my husband have only been trying for 4 months but already I'm finding it difficult to cope with not getting pregnant. Started my period a week early today and spent all morning crying.
by wannabeemom 2nd Feb 2009, 10:48am
oh i'm so glad to find women who are in my situation too. been married almost a year, came off depo and doc said " just wait, it will take time". I'm on progesterone cream now, have been for 3 months, had scans etc done. no real issue except low progest. hubby isn't really understanding how i'm feeling and when i'm getting my period every 2 weeks i'm so upset :( i don't drink, eat healthy take vits, but i'm still moody and no baby :(
by Loz28 2nd Feb 2009, 10:48am

Hi me and my husband have been trying for 2 yrs, still no baby we have been under a consultant for the last year, had all the tests and have been told we are healthy, which is good news but still dosnt make us pregnant I'm getting so upset every month, when I get my period, I try to relax, I'm on a diet and eating healthy, taking vitamins and drinking no alcohol, I feel like i'm never going to get pregnant, and feel moody most of the time with my husband, and insecure, which does not help the baby process!!!
by Clay75 27th Jan 2009, 9:15am
well didnt get another period this month so i was all excited thaught i might ofgotten lucky! but took a test last week and still negative, im so sick of just seeing one line!!
by mindyk 22nd Jan 2009, 8:56am
I've been trying for 3 years now. I've already tried the 'relax' methodology. Didn't work. To make it worse, we travel a lot and that's making it difficult for us to get treatment :( I dread talking to old friends and family members beacuse even strangers have started asking me questions. Young mothers' say -"Oh, you got married before us?" Why can't people just leave us alone? They should have the basic courtesy of not asking personal questions.
by Sheenu 19th Jan 2009, 9:56am
i want a baby so bad cant wait hard to relax
by dogooder 16th Jan 2009, 9:44am
hey everyone new here I have been on these sites before but never joined, but its come to a point where I feel a lil at breaking point. My issue is I was trying for over a year and I got pregnant and then miscarried which was in aug of this year. My partner already has a child from a previous relationship which is making this 10 times worse and I just feel it is all my fault. I too get told I need to relax and it will happen, but it just makes me cry everytime i get my period and I take it out on my partner. I too hope I can find comfort talking to others. Any advice? scared im gonna push my partner away.
by cath12 9th Dec 2008, 8:46am
Hey ladies I totally understand this is a real stressful experience my husband keeps telling me i need to relax but how can I every month you sit and wait to see if you are about to start your period the slightest pain or frequent urinating makes you think am I or not?? What i have done is got rid of all my ovulation kits I have stopped counting days and have started a class I enjoy hopefully as i wont be thinking about it so much i might just get lucky. Just as great as the kits are I know I have had them all they do not help with the emotions. I am so glad I can talk to someone.
by Azy 18th Nov 2008, 8:40am
Hi Darcey15, I'm exactly the same as you, I'm 21 & have been with my partner for almost 4 years. We have a house together & have been trying since Feb this year. It's so difficult esp as like you said, everyone else is getting pregnant around you. I have to go see a week old baby tonight whose my friend's baby & altho I'm over the moon for my friend, it's gunna be the hardest thing....hope we can all find comfort talking to each other
by lisaw31 13th Nov 2008, 9:42am
It's the first time I have even looked on the internet for anything related to getting frustrated with not conceiving, simply because I have hidden it very well so far. I always thought that if I let my feelings run away with me I would start to get stressed. I am now in my 8th month of trying and like many people on this site and others have noticed every man and his dog being pregnant (well not quite!? ha ha)..been feeling a bit angry and upset, especially the last time of the month. I keep looking for statistics that say i'm ok and theres no need to worry, but I cant help it, something in the back of my head keeps saying "what if I cant have children" . Is anyone going through the same thing at the moment? 1st time I have been on here so hope this works :)
by Darcey15 6th Nov 2008, 8:55am
Hello. Glad I can spill out my mind here. Got married November last year and till now not pregnant. Did scans and went for a hormonal profile test. Was told possibility not ovulating. Used Clomiphene. Went for scan and was told plenty follicles seen June this year. In July, when I was to see my period, threw up 3 ce and was urinating quite often. Now 4 months laten no period. Went for another scan and was told cysyts seen in right ovary; other normal. What can I do; getting really worried? Would love to hear from you.
by Pinty 20th Oct 2008, 11:02am