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Baby sleep training methods

Advice on baby sleep training techniques including controlled crying, crying down and the core night method.


Discuss baby sleep training methods on our forums, right now! Or, post a comment below.

Crying down

This method can be particularly helpful when initial feeding problems have been resolved and a baby only has mild sleep association problems or has difficulty falling asleep because he is overtired or over-stimulated.The technique involves leaving your baby to cry, and although it's very difficult to listen to a young baby cry himself to sleep, it will prevent serious sleep problems in the future.

Crying down with a baby under six weeks usually lasts between five and 10 minutes, although with some babies who have become over-tired and fight sleep, it can last up to 20 minutes. If you find the crying hard to ignore try and wait for five to 10 minutes before going in to your baby.

You can then enter your baby's room and reassure him with a soothing touch or quiet voice. This should be kept to between one to two minutes before leaving him. You should then wait about 5-10 minutes before returning. Try to repeat this procedure until the baby learns to sleep by himself.

The core night

The core night method can be used for a baby over six weeks, who weighs more than 4.6kg (l0lb), has fallen into a good daytime routine and is settling well in the evening, and provided he's putting on enough weight each week. You'll know it's the right time to start thinking about this method when your baby's still waking in the night looking for a feed but not feeding well at 7am.

The core night works on the principle that once a baby sleeps for one longer spell in the night over several nights, he shouldn't be fed again during the hours slept in the course of the core night. Once you've seen that your baby can last a certain length of time without a feed, you can use this opportunity to help him to sleep longer. If he wakes during these hours, he should be left for a few minutes to settle himself back to sleep.

If he doesn't settle, try patting him, offering him a dummy or a sip of water, giving him the minimum of attention. Babies over six weeks who are putting on a good amount of weight each week but who are still waking at 3am should be offered a dummy or a bottle of cool, boiled water. If your baby still won't settle, give him the smallest feed that gets him through until 7am.

Controlled crying

If all other methods have failed, controlled crying is the most effective way to sleep-train babies over 6 months.

It is an intense technique and takes a lot of commitment and perseverance but can be very successful in getting your baby to sleep through. If your baby is still feeding in the night, however, it's a good idea to try the core night method to ensure he isn't crying from genuine hunger.

Start controlled crying in the evening on the first day. The same procedure should be carried out no matter how many times your baby or toddler wakes up in the night.

Day 1
  • Step 1 Decide on a regular time to start the bedtime routine and stick to it. Allow at least one hour for the bath, milk feed and settling.


  • Step2 Settle your child in his bed before he gets too sleepy. Kiss him goodnight and leave the room.


  • Step 3 Allow a minimum of five to 10 minutes of crying before returning to reassure him. Reassurance should be kept to the minimum. You can stroke him or say 'ssh-ssh' softly, but resist the urge to pick him up. Leave the room after two minutes even if he continues to cry.


  • Step 4 After the first half hour of crying, the times between visits should be increased by five to 10 minutes each time, to 15-20 minutes between visits.


  • Step 5 Continue with the checking plan every 15-20 mins until your baby or toddler falls asleep. Reassurance should still be kept to a minimum of no more than two minutes and he shouldn't be lifted out of the cot.


  • Step 6 If your baby wakes in the night, continue to follow the same plan for the evening, gradually increasing the time between visits, until you are going in every 15-20 minutes.
Day 2

For daytime naps, it is important you start where you left off in the night.
  • Step 1 Wait at least 20 minutes before checking your baby and continue to keep visits to him to a maximum of two minutes, with the minimum of reassurance.


  • Step 2 If your baby or toddler falls asleep closer to the time he's meant to be getting up, allow 15 minutes in the morning nap and 45 minutes at the lunchtime nap so he won't end up sleeping after 3pm in the afternoon. If your baby's very tired he may need a short nap of 15-20 minutes late afternoon, so he doesn't become over-tired.


  • Step 3 Follow the same settling procedure as the first night in the evening, this time waiting 20-25 minutes before returning. During visits on the second night, reassure your baby by saying "ssh-ssh", but don't stroke or touch him.


  • Step 4 If your baby is still crying after the first hour, the time between visits should be increased to 35-40 minutes.


  • Step 5 If he wakes in the night, you should wait 45 minutes before checking him, and you shouldn't speak to him or stroke him. Reduce visits to one minute.
Day 3

By the third day, the majority of babies and toddlers will be settling themselves at all sleep-times within 20 minutes and there's no need to check on them.
  • Step 1 If your baby backtracks at one of the steep-times and you have to go back to checking him, start off with looking in on him every 15-20 minutes and increase the interval until you are back to 4-5-50 minutes.


  • Step 2 Once your child has done a few days of settling within 20 minutes, you should be able to use the crying-down method for getting him off to sleep. Within a couple of weeks, the majority of babies and toddlers will be going to sleep without any fuss at all.

Your Comments

We would love to hear your comments or views on this subject. If you would like to ask a question or start a discussion, please post a topic in our Getting Baby To Sleep forum.
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I have a 2 year old daughter who up until 2 nights agao was sleeping in bed with me and my husband. we had tried the controlled crying technique before when she was 8 months old but we gave up because she would make herself sick and scream for hours on end, we tried again the other night and put her to bed at 7pm and read a story etc the said goodnight and closed the bedroom door, she cried and got out of bed but i went in and checked her every 5 mins and put her back in bed without talking to her or making eye contact then left the room, after doing this a few times she finally gave up and fell asleep half an hour later, in the night she cried twice but i left her and she settled herself and slept til 7am, last night she only took 15 mins to fall asleep and i got up once in the night to put her dummy back in and she went straight back to sleep until the morning. I'm really pleased with this progress so far, obviously we've got to do this for a few more nights yet but hopefully in a couple of weeks she will be able to settle herself to sleep at night in her own bed..
hope this gives others the willpower , because controlled crying can work!!!
added by jennie83 [Mon 23rd Jun 2008 @ 08:29:00]
i have 11 month old baby who cannot get to sleep by himself, i amstill nursing him so he just falls asleep while feeding. I put him into his cot once he has nodded off, but he wakes shortly after and the whole process starts again, this may happen 4-5 times a night. how can i break this habbit and yet continue to nurse him?
added by fid [Wed 11th Jun 2008 @ 08:43:34]
My baby is 6 months old. He is now in mobile. And i start to introduce him solid food. I am not sure whether that are the factosr that cause his sleeping problems recently. Normally he fall to sleep around 9pm, but waked after 30 - 45 min and cry. I wish the controlled crying method will work for me. Is difficult to hear your baby crying. And now he is not just crying, he crawl to the door and knock on it. I feel guilty but I really want him to learn how to sleep on his own.
added by lotuslee [Tue 27th May 2008 @ 08:38:15]
I've just done the first night of trying to get my 4 month old baby to fall asleep on her own. She goes off for her morning nap by herself absolutely fine....but in the evenings, I've been nursing her to sleep, which I know I need to stop! She cried for a total of 26 minutes, of which I went in twice to settle her....the first time, mistakenly picking her up out of her cot. Not responding whilst listening to your baby crying for you is like glass going through your heart! But I know that she needs to learn to fall asleep on her own at some point soon and the later I leave it to teach her to drift off to sleep independently, the harder it will be for the both of us. I want to raise my child to be confident and I honestly believe that I'm teaching her to feel safe in the house for years to come. It's very VERY hard to hear your baby crying for you....but if you go back in and settle them.....then come away again it will work....eventually! Even though it felt like an age - I don't think 26 minutes on the first night was that bad. I've probably spoken to soon, haven't I?!

2nd Night:
Tonight was 1 hr 20 mins. Feel like she's going to hate me tomorrow. I feel terrible and want to cry my eyes out too!
added by Issy [Mon 19th May 2008 @ 08:50:49]
OK People wish me luck. Im going to try the controlled crying method with my daughter for the next three nights and see what happens. Shes almost 6months old now and im returning back to work soon and i really REALLY need her to start to sleep right through. Im prepared not to sleep much over the next few nights untill we get this sorted!! I'll keep you posted!!
added by gemma5633 [Thu 1st May 2008 @ 08:49:43]
I trained my daughter to sleep at 6 mths. I could not take the sleepless nights anymore and she was just waking to hang out. I gave her all the attention she needs during the day but she wanted more at night. Since I have used the controlled crying method she has never been happier. She wakes well rested and so happy. It was a tough couple nights but I kept asking myself these questions. Do I want a older child that can't sleep with out my help (I would personally love to have my child need me forever but I think that that would be selfish of me)? Will I be a better mother to my child if I am well rested? Is it still cute and acceptable to have my 6 yr old waking at night and needing me?
My daughter knows how to sleep on her own now. I have given her such a gift teaching her to sleep.
JJ07 I think your little one will be just fine. You need to set a time to do it and get your husband on board. Your in for a tough couple of nights but the rewards are so worth it. Good luck and stay strong!
To all the people thinking that it will lead to attachment disorders, I disagree. I would argue that a child that still can't sleep through the night or needs a parent to fall asleep has an attachment disorder. There is nothing wrong with being able to sleep independently. I think the earlier it is addressed is easier on a child.
added by Happybabyhappymommy [Wed 23rd Apr 2008 @ 08:30:06]
Hi I was wondering if anyone has tried the controlled crying/sleeping technique with older babies. Jack is now almost 11 months and we stopped his 11pm bottle about a month ago. Since then he is sleeping less and waking up crying and stands up in the cot looking at us (we only have 1 bed flat). Once we pick him up he stops crying immed. and sometimes falls straight back to sleep.
Someone suggested controlled crying method but when we leave him he stands up in the cot and cries. Please could somone confirm this is ok and that we leave him standing whilst trying this method? We try to get him to lie back down but he just stands back up again as soon as we walk away. Jack usually sleeps in a sleeping bag, we have tried without one too but he still stands up. Please help...i go back to work soon and my husband and i are desperate for some sleep.
added by JJ07 [Tue 25th Mar 2008 @ 09:06:29]
It can have a damaging effect actually...something called attachment disorders...your child could grow upto be overly sensative easily affected and upset and not being able to trust easily...my mother has studied it...it's reasons why lots of teenagers are the way teenagers are expected to be...they're acting out to get attention they never had when they were younger...they can't ask for it because (as they know fom their childhood) that doesn't work...maybe leaving them to cry once but not letting them gry again and again for longer and longer!!!
My mum used to leave my sister to cry because she knew she was ok because she'd had 3 children before her and now my sister is exactly what i said at the beginning!
added by Mummy08 [Wed 19th Mar 2008 @ 09:19:02]
I am a sleep trainer and provide help to parents who are at their wits end, I am concerned by the remarks left by jg1977, sleep traing does not have a negative effect on psyche later on in life! In actual fact, by teaching your child how to sleep by themselves is giving them the best gift a parent can. I just wanted to commend askbaby.com on their advice, as it is good, I have used a combination of the methods laid out, with great success for many years. Keep up the good work, and parents - don't be afraid of hearing your baby cry, as long as all their other needs have been attended to then you won't be doing them any harm!
added by happierfamilies [Tue 26th Feb 2008 @ 09:21:27]
actually as i read this i was very reassured. my now 18 month old went through the normal routine of learning when to be asleep and when to be awake, and i didn't have this reference. but using my instincts, and yes, letting him cry sometimes, he has slept through the night pretty consistently, from about 2 months old. the key is, there is a difference between a bored/want to hang out with mom or dad cry, and a true "there is something WRONG" cry. my son is the happiest and sweetest baby i know. i have no qualms whatsoever that he might worry i wouldn't "be there" for him when he needs me. it's just that nighttime is for sleeping, and daytime is for hanging out/cuddling/playing. there are some nights when i know that he has a hard day, and i don't hesitate to comfort him when needed (sick, new routine, whatever it might be). you just have to use guidelines like these with a healthy dose of common sense and intuition. they're not saying to leave your child in his room indefinitely, screaming from neglect. it also depends on their age - i always let my son run the "show" so to speak, until he was a couple months old and i had to go back to work. but babies are smart. unless something is truly wrong with your baby, i don't see a problem with this advice. it's almost exactly what my son and i worked out between us, just by common sense, when we had this issue.
added by ksdiamond [Mon 25th Feb 2008 @ 08:37:19]
I would just like to say that letting your baby cry themselves to sleep is not teaching them how to sleep on their own. It is teaching them that their cries are not responded to by the people he/she is supposed to trust most in the world. They have just been born into the world, coming from the womb where their every need was catered for and then you want to abandon them on their own to cry themselves to sleep? Do you not think this will have very negative effects on the baby's psyche in later years? Believe me it will!They are babies for such a short amount of time, why not try more humane methods, ones that mean you listen to your intuition?
added by jg1977 [Fri 4th Jan 2008 @ 09:03:22]
i tried this core night and controlled crying method with my child and found it a massive help. she took one night of intense crying, then took an hour to go down for the next couple of nights. now she sleeps from 7pm-7am!
added by libbysmom [Mon 22nd Oct 2007 @ 09:38:47]
We are on day 3 of the controlled crying method and we have reached 2.5 hours. Do we win a prize ? Is there a previous record we should be aiming for ?
added by PWM [Thu 26th Apr 2007 @ 10:20:34]
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